Babe Ruth is Not My Doppelgänger

What if you looked like a famous person, someone known the world over? Would you spend your days sipping mixed drinks by the pool, charging everything to the real Carrot Top's tab? Or possibly signing glossy 8x10s to enthusiastic diner owners, hoping for free sandwiches?

When I look in the mirror, I only see Ben looking back. No big deal. My coworkers don't do double-takes when I walk to the copier. 

But Gary Nolan Circa 1974? Gary Nolan Circa 1974 has the same rosy-cherub face as Babe Ruth Circa 1918. And if I didn't know that Nolan was, in fact, a real person, I might believe you if you told me that this photo was part of an elaborate practical joke played on Sparky Anderson—a wax figure of the Babe done up in a sporty wig and Cincinnati jersey, posed in front of a locker, the athlete's natural habitat.

I hope Gary used his uncanny resemblance to the Babe to his advantage. I'm talking about free artery-clogging food, free beer, free cigars, poorly thought-out endorsement deals, lots of showgirls, getting his stomach pumped on the train between Cincinnati and Pittsburgh, and generally carrying on with a devil-may-care attitude and little regard for his long-term health—like any celebrity doppelgänger should. I mean, who would squander a free pass to push a piano into a pond? 

Not me, my friend. Not me.

Fun fact I learned on the back of this card: Gary's full name is Gary Lynn Nolan. Can you name another famous baseball player with a similar name? That's right: Lynn Nolan Ryan. So really, Gary should change his name to Gary Lynn Nolan Ryan. Or better yet, let's start a petition for him to change it to Gary Fred Lynn Nolan Ryan. 

I bet we could get like a million signatures.