Double D

 Danny Darwin, 1991 Topps

GETTING READY FOR THE SEASON.

ARM FEELS GOOD.

PANTS FEEL BETTER.

SHOWING UP TO CAMP IN SHAPE LIKE A BOSS.

STAY BEHIND THE YELLOW ROPE, BASEBALL FANS - DOUBLE D IS TRYING TO WARM UP HERE.

GONNA THROW A FEW FROM THE STRETCH JUST IN CASE A RUNNER GETS ON BY ACCIDENT.

LIKE CATCHER'S INTERFERENCE OR WHATEVER.

A DOZEN YEARS IN DA GAME, HAVEN'T LOST MY ZIP.

SEXUALLY.

(THRUSTS GROIN)

OR FOR BASEBALL.

(THRUSTS GROIN)

HATERS GOIN HATE.

BOUT TO TRY OUT THE NEW SLIDER.

MMMPPFF.

STRIKE FOURTEEN.

CAN'T TOUCH THIS.

"LOOKING GOOD, DOUBLE D."

DON'T CALL ME THAT YA' DUMB JERK.

(TURNS AROUND, THROWS BASEBALL AT BAT/CANE, KNOCKS IT OUT OF HAND, COACH FALLS DOWN)

NAME'S DR. DEATH.

YOU'VE JUST BEEN DR. DEATH-ED, OLD MAN. TELL A FRIEND.

"THAT'S WHAT I MEANT BY DOUBLE D, YA' WACK JOB. MY HIP IS OUT OF SOCKET NOW!"

OH MY BAD.

ANYBODY ELSE WANT SOME?

DIDN'T THINK SO.