The Lumberjack

Luis Medina, 1989 Baseball Cards magazine

Apparently, I cut this “Baseball Cards Rookie Stars of 1989” card from Baseball Cards magazine. I was undoubtedly lured—if not by the potential of Luis Medina alone—by the descriptive title, “Baseball Cards,” figuring this baseball card would go nicely with my collection of baseball cards. Also, I am unsure how well this comes across on these here Interwebs, but please note that I cut along the top border of the card so as to make it appear as crown molding or something. I am unsure if the card in its original state led to me to do this, or if this idea was borne of my own creative inspiration. Either way, it’s quite a bit of handiwork.

So obviously, Luis Medina was a Rookie Star of 1989 who stood proudly in front of his home flag of … Luxembourg? The Netherlands? Yugoslavia? I am unsure. It is also possible those are just random lines. He played for the Indians of Cleveland.

Whether he finally winds up as an outfielder, a first baseman or a designated hitter, Luis Medina will be a major league hitter.

Wow, that is a bold statement with regards to this Major League Baseball player who plays for the Cleveland Indians of Major League Baseball.

Everything he’s done in the minor leagues points to that.

Another thing that points to that is that he is already in the major leagues.

Drafted an amazing seven times

???????????????????? Who gets drafted seven times? What is that?

before finally being signed, Luis put together four superb minor league seasons in the Indians’ organization before finally getting the callup to Cleveland in September 1988. He didn’t disappoint.

Medina hit six home runs in 51 at-bats, and posted a .255/.309/.608, so no, he did not disappoint. From there he also did not disappoint, as, according to Wikipedia, Medina also holds the trivial distinction of having the fewest career RBI among all players with exactly 10 career home runs. So there is that. It is an odd thing that Medina’s stay in the bigs was a brief one, considering he had the swing of a lumberjack.

Scout: Got a guy here you gotta see. Been drafted six times. Hits a bunch of home runs. Swings likes a lumberjack.

GM: He swings likes a lumberjack? What does that mean? Is that good?

Scout: Of course it’s good! Like a lumberjack, you know … with a lot of power or whatever.

GM: But are you saying he swings mechanically like a lumberjack? Like he literally tries to swing down on the baseball and chop it in half? Because that’s not really the kind of player we’re looking for.

Scout: YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, CARL! Hey Luis!

Luis Medina: Wearing boots, suspenders, and a hat that covers his eyes. Yep?

Scout: Hit a home run!

Medina: Sure thing! Swings axe, cuts baseball in half, both halves go over the fence.

GM: Okay, sign him. Like I always say, seventh time’s a charm.