August 01, 2012

A Taste of Two Gundersons


Eric Gunderson, 1991 Score

So apparently there is ANOTHER Eric Gunderson out there, amazingly, who is a member of the country trio Love and Theft, whatever that is. The presence of other Eric Gunderson was an unwelcome deterrent to my exhaustive research on real Eric Gunderson, baseball person. I got through it okay, guys, but it was tough. It was tough mainly in the respect that there is nothing out there regarding real Eric Gunderson. Meanwhile, other Eric Gunderson is on Twitter and stuff ... where is the justice here? Anyway, if my information overlaps, it's not my fault.

Eric gave the Giants a taste of his darting fastball in '90 and they liked what they saw.

Sorry, Score, but you can't see taste. Try this on for size:

Eric gave the Giants a taste of his darting fastball in '90, and they liked what they tasted.

Or:

Eric gave the Giants a taste of his darting fastball in '90, and what they (the Giants) tasted (the darting fastball) was delicious.

Or even:

Eric gave the Giants a taste of his darting fastball in '90, and they tasted it and were like, "This darting fastball tastes like heaven. Bring him to the big leagues, where he can taste success!"

Any one of these could have won "Lede of the Year, '90." Just saying. Where were we?

A mentally-tough southpaw,

I'm sorry, is there any other kind? I have literally never met a weak-minded left-handed person. It goes completely against science.

he was arrested for trying to board the plane with a large hunting knife.

That is ... something. I am lost. (By the way, that article describes Love and Theft as a duo. WHAT HAPPENED TO THEFT?) I need some manager-speak to bring everything back to normal here.

"He can't throw the ball straight," said manager Roger Craig.

Maybe the greatest managerial compliment (?) we've ever featured here on The BBC Blog. Outstanding stuff. I realize what he's trying to say here, that Gunderson's fastball has such natural movement he couldn't throw it straight if he tried. Still, you should probably, as a pitcher, be able to throw straight sometimes, yes? No? I am wrong? Okay, fine.

"He's got a heavy sinker that can get you out of an inning quickly with a DP. Actually, it's not a typical sinker, but a fastball that moves everywhere."

"He's got a curveball that can bend a guy's a knees. Actually, it's not a curveball, but a fastball that curves. It curves almost as much as his changeup, which isn't so much a chanegup, but a fastball that moves everywhere and a little bit slower, for some reason. It reminds me of his slider, which is also a fastball and not a slider, contrary to what I just said two seconds ago. He only throws a fastball, Gunderson."

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